


we only cherish what we have when its gone

by yakitalki



Series: yaki's assclass fics [5]
Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: Abused Shiota Nagisa, Angst, Character Death, Depression, Emotional Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M, Shiota Nagisa Needs a Hug, Shy Shiota Nagisa, Sorry Not Sorry, Suicide, Suicide Notes, Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-18
Updated: 2021-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-26 21:54:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30112605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yakitalki/pseuds/yakitalki
Summary: I love you. maybe in another life, we'll meet up and live out our dreamanyways i hope i made yall cry with this one‼️its a oneshot stop asking for more‼️and no i will not be fixing hinanos part
Relationships: Akabane Karma/Shiota Nagisa
Series: yaki's assclass fics [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2132928
Comments: 8
Kudos: 30





	we only cherish what we have when its gone

_Sugino._

_Hey. I… don’t know how to put this in words. You were the first person that really stayed for me no matter what I did. My first true, best friend. Thanks for that, honestly. I’ll never be able to express how much I care for you, or how much I truly enjoyed playing baseball with you after school. Just remember, no one can take your dreams away from you. They can try, but Sugino, I SWEAR, don’t ever give up on yourself._

_Kayano._

_Hi Kayano. I know this is a selfish thing to do, but take care of Sugino for me alright? He’s probably going to end up throwing a baseball through a window after he sees the news. I know I shouldn’t be asking anything of you. You helped me with putting my hair up, no matter how insignificant it seemed to you and the rest of the class. I’m sorry for making you lose someone else. You can be strong through this, no matter what. And Kayano, there wasn’t anything you could’ve done._

_Kanzaki._

_I regret not being able to spend more time with you and the girls. You all seemed like a really fun group to hang out with if I hadn’t been so shy. But this isn’t about them, it’s about you! Sort of, they’ll get mentioned. Sorry, I’m getting off track. Thank you for being so brave and kind to us 3-E students._

_Ritsu and Takebayashi._

_I hope you’re able to read this and understand. What am I saying, of course, you would! You’re really smart, and I respect that, even if you aren’t human. I’m not very good with tech, but I hope that one day you can share your knowledge and hacking skills with everyone. 01000111 01101111 01101111 01100100 01100010 01111001 01100101 00100000 01010010 01101001 01110100 01110011 01110101 00101110 (: Also Takebayashi, no one ever overlooked you. Regardless of what you think, you’re just as an important asset to 3-E as everyone else is._

_Chiba and Hayami._

_You guys are honestly really cool. I know you don’t talk much and tend to stay away from the rest of us, but I’ve always admired you two. You don’t take shit from anyone, and the sniper skills the two of you possess are so cool, for real. Don’t ever feel like you didn’t do good enough, because even if you don’t get it right the first time, it’s practice for when you finally do it correctly. This applies to anything, really._

_Hinano._

_Hinano you’re really cool >o_

_Isogai and Maehara._

_I’m going to start out with Isogai. (sorry Maehara! >///<) Isogai, you are the coolest class representative I’ve ever had. (please don’t tell Kataoka I said that :p) I’ll miss the way you had to break up fights between Kayano and Okuda over pudding. It always ended with an empty, broken container of pudding, right? But in all honesty, I appreciate everything you did for the class. You were really amazing, being able to keep up with school and work at the cafe. I wish that the rest of your life goes well for you, Isogai. Maehara time!_

_Maehara, no matter how many times you almost (or did) harass someone with Okajima, it brought a smile to my face. I know that sounds weird, but I don’t mean it that way! I mean it was fun to see you purposefully annoy someone to get a reaction out of them. Oh, I never got to tell you, but I really liked your ombre hair._

_Kataoka and Okajima._

_You two never failed to make me laugh. Even if I didn’t really express that laugh, it was hilarious to see you two fight. I bet you could’ve been the best of friends if Okajima didn’t read as much hentai. Just kidding, just kidding. But you guys did have a lot of friend potential. A shame I wasn’t able to see that play out one day. Keep helping out everyone, okay? (Oh, but don’t feel obligated to! Up to you, of course!)_

_Nakamura._

_I’ll regret not being able to dress up for you and Karma haha. As much as it bothered me in the beginning, I realize now that you didn’t mean it in a cruel way. At the school festival, you saved my butt with Yuji. Thanks for that!!! (even if he did end up finding out I was indeed male) I heard you were a certified genius back in grade school and wanted to fit in with everyone. I don’t know if you regret that, but I just wanted to say that you were always a great friend. I thought you might want to hear that._

_Itona._

_You don’t have to be the strongest to be loved. Everyone in that classroom thinks of you as a brother, I promise it. No one thinks you’re weak and helpless. Itona, don’t be afraid of people not wanting you or abandoning you. You’re fun to be around and your blunt opinions are fun to hear. We all love you._

_Yoshida, Muramatsu, and Hazama._

_You give me Metallica vibes. That and the old American movies, Gremlins, and Back to the Future. Don’t know why haha. Stop bullying Muramatsu’s ramen >:( Relay that to Itona as well. I’ll miss you guys a lot. I know we weren’t the closest bunch in our assassination classroom, but I will regret the times I chose to talk to someone else. I took time for granted. Go watch those movies, and listen to the band!_

_Hara, Okuda, Okano, Mimura, and Yada._

_The VIBES I get from you guys. Stunning. I’m rushing through these, but I want to make sure that you guys don’t feel like I didn’t care for you. I really did. Regardless of what assassination attempts we tried and failed, it didn’t make me dislike you guys less. I learned a lot from you four, like gymnastics and what food should be included in my diet. (thanks hara) You four, never give up. Don’t ever act on the feeling of invalidation or fear. Push through it, and one day it’ll all be better, if not rewarding.  
And Okuda, you don’t need to be the most expressive person in the world. You are enough. Don’t forget that._

_Fuwa._

_As I’m writing this, Reiner is standing by my side. (joke joke joke.) I never told you I liked manga and anime, did I? My bad. We could’ve had some epic anime binges. I bet we could’ve finished One Piece. If you ever do, make sure to think of me._

_Sugaya, and Kimura._  
_Don’t let anything get in the way of your success. You two are worth more than you imagine. People who say otherwise are more stupid than I am. They’re absolute idiots._

…

_Korosensei._

_You were the best teacher I’ve ever had. I know I’ve told you that before, but you were one of the first people to actually look me in the eyes when having a conversation. You and Mr. Karasuma that is. I’m sorry I couldn’t live up to your expectations, or follow your rules to live by. I was just a failing student anyway. You meant more to me than probably my entire family does combined. You see me as an individual, my own person, and I couldn’t be more for that. Even though I’ve given up the fight, your class, 3-E, our class, was genuinely the most amazing thing that’s ever happened to be in my life. I am forever in your debt. I hope one day 3-E will kill you. When that day comes, and you’ve left the world as a human or whatever you were before scientifically modified, that you see our old teacher again. And maybe me, who knows if I will decide to haunt that old schoolhouse._

_Karma..._

_This is it, huh? I’m leaving you this time. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so so so sorry. You don’t deserve this, no one truly deserves this. I just can’t do it anymore Karma. Everything hurts, and I know you wouldn’t call me weak, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell you. I can’t live like this anymore. The pain is unbearable. But this letter isn’t to express my emotions finally, it’s a goodbye. It’s a goodbye to every memory we shared. It’s a goodbye to the laughter, to the smiles, to the sweetest things we knew while together. I should’ve told you what you meant to me, you know? You mean so much, I can’t explain. Every day is you. All of it is you. And I’m taking it all away. I’m not ready to say goodbye._

_It hurts so much it might make me sick. I will never forget your smile and how slyly you manipulate people. Your eyes have that stunning golden glow to them that has no equal. You were my first and final love. So this is where it all ends. The merry-go-round of life is slowing to a stop._

_I love you._

_Goodbye 3-E. Goodbye my favorite assassination classroom. Goodbye, Karma. Maybe in another life, we’ll all meet again._

_-Nagisa Shiota_


End file.
